The Hills Have Pride
In a turnout that shocked nobody, 300 reigned for a second straight weekend. I finally saw it (in IMAX no less) and I can say without reservation that it’s the most visually stunning film I’ve ever seen. Also, the most testosterone per foot of celluloid since The Fast and the Furious.
Also saw The Host, which practically redefines the monster movie. Think of it as a very dark Little Miss Sunshine.
The big news this weekend, at least for my neck of the woods, is the probable buyout of my beloved local Ritz chain of indie theaters by Landmark. I have very mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, Landmark probably will run a tight indie ship, and may even improve upon the current Ritz experience. On the other hand, I weep on principle for one more independently owned theater biting the dust. And I’m nervous for my equally beloved Charles theater in Baltimore, which is about to face some stiff competition from the very same.
3/23
Wide
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
If you’re a sniper, and someone asks you to use your sniping skills to protect the President, you’re being set up. And not for nothing, but if you tell somebody something and their response is “Have you told anyone else?” say “Yes. I told my friends, my book club, I posted it on my blog and I just finished telling my mom.”
WILL IT SUCK?
From Training Day (and nothing else good) director Antoine Fuqua and based on a novel by film critic Stephen Hunter (why didn’t he write the screenplay?). Screenplay from the guy who wrote Lethal Weapon 4 (not terrible, but most of that was Jet Li) and Red Planet (for which there is no excuse).
Early buzz is pretty “meh.”
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Caught between the considerable b.o. appeal of Mark Wahlberg and the complete overcrowding of this weekend. $47mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
It’s Adam Sandler! And he’s being serious!
WILL IT SUCK?
This comes from writer/director Mike Binder who created the surprisingly good Upside of Anger in ‘05. What’s interesting is that the grief Sandler’s character is dealing with (with some help from old buddy Don Cheadle) is from losing his family on 9/11. Strangely, there’s no mention of this in the trailer. Can’t tell if that’s admirable or confuzzling.
Early buzz is mixed leaning towards good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Probably not any worse than Spanglish. $43mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Reboot of the popular - well, for one film at least - franchise about turtles who kick ass.
WILL IT SUCK?
Nice voice cast. Kevin Smith, Ziyi Zhang, Patrick Stewart. Sadly, doesn’t look like they got Vanilla Ice or Corey Feldman to reprise their roles from II and III respectively. The cartoon was nice and the comic was the harshness so if they can tap into that, good on ‘em.
Early buzz is not good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
As far as CG goes, Meet the Robinsons will be an issue the following week, but that doesn’t have any fanboy following. $79mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
The National Guard vs. mutants.
WILL IT SUCK?
First of all, there was already a Hills Have Eyes 2, but that was bikers vs. mutants. Wes Craven writes here with his son, and newcomer Martin Weisz, already a hotshot for directing a cannibal film that got banned in Germany, directs.
Early buzz is good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Sort of obliquely dealing with The Last Mimzy this week and definitely up against Skinwalkers the next, but ultimately in a class by itself. $42mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Black Men Can Swim
WILL IT SUCK?
First off, read what may turn out to be my favorite MPAA story of the year. Of the four screenwriters, the only one with a deep resume looks like he did Beauty Shop and Roll Bounce. That having been said, early buzz is good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Crowded weekend doesn’t help. $19mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Toys from the future give kids strange new powers.
WILL IT SUCK?
Quite an involved background here. Based on a Lewis Padgett (actually Henry Kuttner and C.L. Moore) short story, “Mimsy Were the Borogoves” (title inspired by Lewis Carroll’s “Jabberwocky”) and adapted by four screenwriters with everything from Jacob’s Ladder to Deadly Friend to their credit (actually, that’s just one guy) and directed by new Peter Jackson nemesis Bob Shaye. What was the question? Early buzz is generally good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
TMNT will crush this family-wise, and anyone looking for its scarier genre attributes will be more attracted to Hills. $34mil.
Limited
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Guy hears fortune teller’s prediction. Loses his shit.
WILL IT SUCK?
From two of the five writers of Children of Men. Guy Pearce, J.K. Simmons and William Fichtner are all up in this. Pretty cool lineup, although I feel like after watching the trailer I can already call the twist. Early buzz is good.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Probably the hottest cast of any indie this week. $2mil.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Women try to sneak into an Iranian soccer match (they’re not so much allowed to watch sporting events with men there). Iran, you so crazy!
WILL IT SUCK?
Early buzz is quite good. Tied for the Silver Bear at Berlin and won the Amnesty International Film Award. Didn’t know they had one. But they won it.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Has a little bit of advance buzz, but Sony Pictures Classics has got to dial this up. $500,000.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
John Malkovich plays a guy pretending to be Stanley Kubrick. Based on a true story.
WILL IT SUCK?
Early buzz is mixed, but it’s interesting to note that both the writer and director were assistants to Kubrick on several films. Malkovich is supposed to be awesome (big shock) and Hustle fave Marc Warren lends a hand.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Nobody knows about this film. $500,000.
Next Week: At this rate, I predict a Will Ferrell jai alai movie by 2010.
March 28th, 2007 at 7:06 pm
Reign Over Me really annoyed me. It seemed unbelievably smug and predictable, and Adam Sandler’s big emotional moment just made me laugh. Not good. I’m with A.O. Scott of the NYT on this one. Go and read Cinematical.com’s review by James Rocchi (we were sitting with him when he saw the film in Austin) and watch how director Mike Binder jumps in and makes a complete ass of himself.